


Is This the Necessary Path?

by ghostcorners



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Blood and Injury, Character Study, Gen, I didn't want to trouble anyone with that in case, I know that I had tagged for graphic depictions of violence but its a quick blood scene, Other Additional Tags to Be Added
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-06
Updated: 2020-05-06
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:28:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24041365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ghostcorners/pseuds/ghostcorners
Summary: “Don’t forget it’s the first real taste of battle for those brats.”For some, the first battle hits harder than others. A character study for Ashe Ubert/Duran to reflect his past and how that impacts his actions underneath the Church's orders at the Academy.
Kudos: 6





	Is This the Necessary Path?

It probably was the worst time to be thinking about the past. Originally Ashe had been trying to psych himself up, thinking about after the mission: what would Lonato think when Ashe had returned from his first ever mission from the Church? Would he be proud? He’d be doing justice by the Church of Seiros after all, just as Lord Lonato and his knights have always done. He’d be just like them.

He first smiles at the thought, getting to be just like the adoptive father he loved so dearly, getting to be like the former adoptive brother who bravely fought as a knight, getting to _be_ that close to being the knight that he dreamt of becoming, but he wonders how such a dream fluttered into his mind. 

In the past such a thought was a luxury to him; in fact, knights were frequently his enemy as he spent his days scurrying away with food from markets and money from strangers he couldn’t care any less for. All he cared for during that time were his younger brother and sister after the loss of both his parents. Too young, he couldn’t keep that restaurant that holds so many memories for them, and so, he and his siblings were cast out on the street. 

He remembers all the arched brows, the raised voices, the fast stomping that was just a tad bit slower than his own, chasing after him for many years, as his hands were full of the precious necessities for his siblings. He remembers the wary eyes and the frequent talks of a neighborhood bandit from the villagers, while he was on his way to steal yet another mass of items. He remembers shutting his eyes everytime, telling himself, “It’s what I have to do.” 

But one night of pilfering, one he had been planning for a long time, comes clearly to his mind, past those repeated memories and vague silhouettes: the night he had decided to rob from Castle Gaspard. He thought such a night would have ended successfully…and it did…in a different way he hadn’t expected. 

It was surprisingly easy to get around the castle despite the guards patrolling; you get used to sneaking around and being cautious after you have been a thief for many years of your life. In fact, he had ransacked a decent amount of goods from the castle that would help save him and his siblings from the sorry state they were in, but as his heart raced, trying to hurry himself out of this alien realm, one thing caught his eye, and he halted everything he was doing. 

He plays with the thought, wondering what would have happened that night if he hadn’t stopped, eyes glancing at the glistening blue cover, dazzled by the silhouette of a knight illustrated proudly beyond masses of people and the unreadable printed lettering that makes up the title. The thought walks with him as he follows after his housemates into the Red Canyon, where the targeted thieves have resided. 

Ashe wonders for a moment, as a child, did the knights ever attempt to track him down the way that he and his housemates had to track down _these_ thieves? Perhaps he would have been in that same position had it not been for that fateful day long ago. 

His new professor talks over him and his classmates, but his eyes are a little too focused on attempting to spot the thieves, thoughts wandering to the what-ifs and planting himself in those thieves’ shoes.

It isn’t so hard to do.

But now isn’t the time; he has a mission he must carry out, after all. 

He repeats the mission goal for himself in his head, “Apprehend the target. Take them back to the monastery.” That’s the ideal he hopes to achieve. 

Yes, like that fateful day when he was lucky enough to meet the altruistic noble that is Lonato. That fateful day when he was shown kindness and given another chance — another life to live — to make up for the wrongs he had done. Just like on that very day, Ashe will prove himself to be just as kind as the man who raised him. Peacefully, he will make things right. 

It is up to him now. He’s got his orders on how to carry out the mission. He’s the first up, and he can’t disappoint. 

Across the stony bridge into the Canyon, Ashe’s eyes hone into figures rushing towards them. He knows he cannot let them get to him nor his companions, but he has to stop them some way. 

Just as in training, he tells himself, pulling the bowstring and angling the weapon. His eyes focus in; he has to be precise — accurate — in where he sends that arrow. Demobilize the enemy. Make it so that they cannot move, and he and his companions can take them away, back to the monastery. He aims the bow at the person’s shin. 

He pulls the bowstring back, whispering into the arrowhead, “I’m sorry about this.”

And he releases. 

A scream emits through the air, and he knows he’s got his target. The enemy stumbles, gripping their shin. At once, Ashe’s eyes widen by the result of his aim. At first, apologies mark his freckled face, wishing to apologize to that target once more, but he realizes what this all means when he made that shot. He didn’t kill — only stopped the target; it was just as he wanted — just as he planned. Just as a proud knight would handle any enemy. A justice being served with kindness — just like Lonato. 

A pride in his smile, Ashe did exactly as he hoped, rushing onward to approach the target. Now he just has to take them back.

But he freezes before he gets a chance to pull his eyes away. 

Despite the arrow in their shin, the bandit is still coming after him, trudging and leaving a trail of blood… But still coming after him. 

His classmates scream at him, and he can feel his heart pulsating, the hairs on his arms standing, as he scrambles for another arrow in his quiver, eyes darting between his shaky hands maneuvering for an arrow and the bandit approaching. 

The screams from his classmates get louder, as they’re fighting their own enemies. He can hear them rushing to fight the others that approach, but that bandit — they’ve got their eyes set on Ashe. His breath hitches. 

Drawing their own bow, the bandit stands their ground and shoots instantly — no hesitation, but Ashe is quick. He jumps and dodges before the arrow lands. He feels the wind from the arrow swipe past him as he dodges slightly, but even feeling the fast air pass him makes him feel as though he was actually hit. 

But the arrows — they keep coming for him. He dodges, but it’s only a matter of time before he gets hit by the numbers. 

He doesn’t want to do it. He has to stop it. 

Hastily, he pulls another arrow and shoots at the bandit, aiming low again, but still, the bandit wouldn’t stop. The bandit won’t stop. 

The bandit’s coming closer, and there’s no stopping despite the arrows they had taken to their legs, determined to put an end to Ashe. 

Ashe knows what he has to do. But he’s afraid to do it. In the corners of his eyes, he could see his classmates doing the same; uncaring stains of crimson mark the tips of their weapons. And they keep on fighting on. He doesn’t want to do it. He has to do it.

The thief's screams grow louder. They’re almost close to Ashe now. 

Ashe panics. He knows what to do. He doesn’t want to. 

Another arrow he aims — no time to aim perfectly. 

He lets go with a held breath.

Then the scream stops.

The air halts around Ashe. 

The thief collapses with no sound, a small distance from Ashe now. Their mouth hangs open mid-scream as they fall, head rolling to its side, teetering between the arrow head and tail that cleanly sticks through their eye. It teeters, clicking Ashe back into reality. 

He just killed someone: a thief who was simply getting by with their lives laid dead before his feet; a thief who hadn’t known better than to turn to ill methods to keep on living; a thief... much like his former self. And unlike him, that thief will never get that chance for a new life. 

When his breath catches up to him, when his heart cannot slow its beating, like drums against his ears and shaking his very core, when his fingers twitch against the wooden bow, he gulps and breathes out a shaky breath, standing over that thief’s body:

“If I'd hesitated, that... that would've been me."

Yes…if he had hesitated, that thief could have killed him. 

If he had hesitated, on that day when Lonato had offered to adopt him and his siblings, he could have still been that very thief.

If he had hesitated, he could have been standing in that very spot that thief once stood…and he would have been the one to be slain. 

If he hesitated, Ashe wouldn’t still be here. 

Fear worms itself into his chest and turns him cold. 

His housemates call for his support from a distance. He had been standing there, staring at the thief’s body for who knows how long as they pushed onward. And like them, he must go on.

Ashe takes a breath again — a long sigh to steady himself . He grounds himself with the breath before he feels himself drift away from the place before him because of the fear encasing him — the fear staring at him. 

Quietly he mutters to the body as he begins to march forward, “It’s what I have to do;” words that were so familiar on his tongue now serve as betrayal to his past, but he must push those feelings down now. 

Ashe is still here, and the mission isn’t over just yet. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for taking the time to read! It's been so fun getting to play FE3H and it really serves as one of my biggest inspirations in writing fics again after having a slump for over a year,, 
> 
> Also I have such a big massive love for Ashe that I wanted to write a character study for him because boy,,, he's actually an interesting character when you think about the guilt Ashe feels for his past, even though he was just getting by. Not only that but his willingness to still be understanding towards those who still have to turn to thievery. So, I'm sure he feels a little mixed when it came to the first battle. 
> 
> Anyways, I just really like Ashe and here's the result of that and THANK YOU AGAIN for taking the time to read through it all. I was just feeling ;v ;


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